Careful

There she is,
Walking by in the distance
And I can’t help but stare.
But in my mind, I say to myself
“Careful, don’t get too close
The closer you get, then
The more it’ll hurt in the end”
All hope is diminished
Into an empty nothingness
And any courage I would need
To walk up to her today
And introduce myself to her
For the very first time
Is an abyss of nonexistence
Maybe tomorrow, I’d say
But I know that deep down,
I’m too afraid now
To ever let anyone new in
And even with the friends
That I already have
I tell myself “careful,
Don’t ever get too close”
So that I remain detached
To everyone and everything
Just so that I won’t get hurt
Like I’ve always been before
I’m cowering in the corner
And locking the door
Is this wrong of me?
What horridness has become of me?

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